Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
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