We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
Randomize
