Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
Randomize
