omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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