I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize