There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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