My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
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If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
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I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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