you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Randomize
