i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
my nose is crying tears of wow.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
