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• (954): View more from Florida

  I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign

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• (225): View more from Louisiana

  She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us

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• (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night

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  19 Cringe-worthy Bachelorette Party Texts

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (404): View more from Georgia

  You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."

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• (708): View more from Illinois

  So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?

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• (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring

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• (315): View more from New York

  There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.

  (440): View more from Ohio

  its Wednesday...

  (315): View more from New York

  they're reeeeeally big trays

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina

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• 

  The 23 Worst Things That Have Happened After a One Night Stand

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (949): View more from California

  He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.

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• (269): View more from Michigan

  We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.

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• (951): View more from California

  What's dad's email?

  (1-951): View more from California

  askmom@cause.idk

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  You just get me

  (443): View more from Maryland

  I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch

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• (908): View more from New Jersey

  Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors

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