Texts From Last Night

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  (864): View more from South Carolina

  Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??

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  (864): Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others?? http://tfl.nu/cnvm
  Replies (102) Good night (7137) Bad night (2437)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.

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  (615): all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia. http://tfl.nu/zayo
  Replies (17) Good night (4813) Bad night (762)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?

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  (330): this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants? http://tfl.nu/rwj9
  Replies (12) Good night (6187) Bad night (1090)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".

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  (910): After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could". http://tfl.nu/pxbj
  Replies (22) Good night (8275) Bad night (1985)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot

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  (727): you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot http://tfl.nu/icr3
  Replies (4) Good night (2350) Bad night (1056)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs

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  (248): Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs http://tfl.nu/e5lz
  Replies (8) Good night (2126) Bad night (1185)
• Favorite

  (210): View more from Texas

  Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.

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  (210): Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move. http://tfl.nu/2sh4
  Replies (4) Good night (1281) Bad night (738)
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  (901): View more from Tennessee

  I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?

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  (901): I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter? http://tfl.nu/wyo3
  Replies (6) Good night (1592) Bad night (681)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.

  (1-775): View more from Nevada

  That was beautiful.

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  (775): True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate. (1-775): That was beautiful. http://tfl.nu/d63d
  Replies (4) Good night (1619) Bad night (1093)
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  (210): View more from Texas

  And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that

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  (210): And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that http://tfl.nu/fyxx
  Replies (6) Good night (870) Bad night (552)
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.

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  (937): Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12. http://tfl.nu/tqh0
  Replies (0) Good night (751) Bad night (373)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...

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  (440): Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far... http://tfl.nu/vk0b
  Replies (2) Good night (650) Bad night (289)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp

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  (860): It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp http://tfl.nu/5iy1
  Replies (3) Good night (375) Bad night (457)
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  (510): View more from California

  Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.

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  (510): Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party. http://tfl.nu/gdgl
  Replies (0) Good night (489) Bad night (245)
• Favorite

  (339): View more from Massachusetts

  It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar

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  (339): It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar http://tfl.nu/fowx
  Replies (0) Good night (447) Bad night (229)

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