I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
Your penis caused this!
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
