Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
