She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
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