I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
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