You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
