Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize
