wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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