i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
