i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
I don't deserve a penis
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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