Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Randomize
