did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
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