the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
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