Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
