I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
