I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
