i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
