I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
