READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
