and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
