I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
