I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
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