Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
You peed on a flamingo?!?
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize
