just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I want a musical about memes.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
