Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
Randomize