I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Randomize
