I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
