weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
there is puke in my bra ... again
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize