I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
Randomize
