You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Randomize
