My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
she smelled like a LAN party
so let's talk penis.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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