Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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