Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Just fell off a train. Bad.
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Randomize
