I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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