I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
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