you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
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