At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Randomize