The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
Randomize
