flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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