suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
