I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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